God dammit, stuck in traffic again! Yeah, sure, go all out with the honking, that will help! How about more of you take the bus or bike to work and leave the roads to people who actually need to take the car! I say when there’s no one else in my car… But I’ll be damned if I take that Jeffrey guy carpooling, he’s so annoying. And I don’t know anyone else who lives nearby enough otherwise, although… Doesn’t Harold live just a few blocks away? I guess I should ask. At least I’ll have someone to talk to with during these stupid traffic jams, as long as they’re not Jeffrey. I guess I will have to listen to the same pop songs over and over again now. Maybe I should invest in a cd or two, if Harold can’t tag along. Or maybe he already carpools with someone else. Now to think of it, he always arrives with Lydia so maybe he does. Hm, or maybe something else is going on between those two. How many times have I seen them together at the coffee machine? Ah well, doesn’t matter, Lydia’s desk is only two away from mine, I guess I could ask her too. I wonder if they’re around here now somewhere among these cars. Let me look around. Nope, all strangers. Although, is that Valery from right below putting on makeup?  Well, I guess you have to do something with your time in here. I’m just looking around at strangers. It looks like that guy is singing along with the radio, rocking out. That couple over there is having a fight, for sure. That guy is definitely upset about being stuck. Of course he’s the one honking all the time too. And that man is just eating his breakfast. Maybe I should start doing that, save some time in the morning. It’s the same old thing every day anyway, that guy’s got it figured out. But if he’s so smart, why doesn’t he carpool, huh? Oh, what do I know, I don’t want to take the one guy that I know for sure lives nearby. Maybe all his colleagues are dicks too. Or maybe he doesn’t even have a job, but then why is he here, helping with clogging everything up? Maybe he likes to enjoy seeing all the working people in distress like this. No wonder he took his breakfast with him.

I wonder if Valery is single. Not that I’m spying on her, of course, but I never see her with a guy. I never hear a bed creaking either. She does seem to like Gorillaz a lot, but that’s the only thing I ever hear anything from below me. And there’s much worse she could blast out. Doesn’t Gorillaz come to town in a month? Maybe I should ask if she wants to go the concert. Yeah, I’ll ask her out tonight. I hope the tickets aren’t sold out yet though. But hey, she might like the gesture, maybe we’ll do something else in the meantime. She does seem to put on a LOT of makeup though. What is she hiding? Is that something you should say to a woman? Ease up on the makeup, you don’t need it? Hm, Gorillaz first, makeup later. I wonder what she does for a job. What does anyone do for a job in my building anyway? So many neighbours and I don’t know them at all. Only one I know who likes Gorillaz though. That would be a cd to buy.

You know, I really hate how the turn signals of cars are always out of synch. Four cars in front of me, none blink at the same rate. See, now they blink once at the same time, but after that, it’s all different speeds, different intervals, … Why? Is it so hard to use on standard speed and delay? Or is it all just a big game, is it on purpose? It’s entertaining in some way, hoping to see them all line up just once, but it’s mostly just infuriating. Then again, I’m in a situation where most things are working on my nerves. If people would just stop honking, geez! You would almost wish for a fly in your car, just for something else to do than look outside and see the other people wishing probably the same thing. Maybe I should pick up knitting. Quick to pick up, easy to put down and continue later on. Or what else could I do in a car? Eat breakfast, of course. Pretend that I can sing. There’s got to be some list on the internet with suggestions. Lots of people stuck in traffic after all.

I can see the end. Cars are speeding up in front of me. Oh sweet freedom, I can taste you. It always gets me how it just dissolves like sugar in coffee. Look at me, going all prosaic. Traffic jams change a man, it would seem like. Well, at least it was no accident that cause this road block. I can just see a plastic cup on the road. Maybe that was the culprit. I’ll tell you what, cup, if Valery says yes to the date, I’ll regret driving over you right now. But fuck you for now.

This blog was brought to you by: Gorillaz – Clint Eastwood